Thursday, January 31, 2013

CHESS: THE WEIRD STUFF

I've been getting Google News on Chess for years and sometimes what is reported is amusing as attention-getters I wish chess was getting in the USA.

Today we learned that some Italian politician under indictment for bribery (this was news?) has now been kicked out of the Italian chess federation for cheating.

Of course he issued the usual set of denials. Others had accused him of wearing special glasses (ostensibly to photograph the board) and to get "secret moves" from someone else. No mention of money being involved. Maybe constitutions should have amendments for cheating at chess. Get caught? Go to prison or suffer the fate of Marie Antoinette. You have to figure out what "constitutes" getting caught. That seems to be the problem. Why are the amateurs ahead of the scientists and law enforcement?

During the same article the author wrote about new clothing rules for female chess players so they would not distract an opponent and what did it concern, "How many buttons might be undone?" What if there were no buttons. This is what is wrong with these kinds of rules; it leaves so many things open (no pun intended) that more rules are needed.

Probably everyone, including the offenders, knows they are doing something wrong but in the age of PC (political correctness) you have to say or write or do exactly the "right thing" so that someone won't be offended and this usually ends up offending others. There are people who just like misbehaving.

They (referees and arbiters) should have Donald Trump type power even if you don't like DT. "You're fired." And you are out. No explanations necessary. No appeals.

After FIDE issued regulations about people arriving at their chess board late this caused a commotion. And some did lose games for showing up late. What is the reason they couldn't have gotten there 5 minutes early--mostly inconvenience, "I don't wanna," etc. Now can you imagine if it was a date and some "hot babe" was sitting at their table? Probably wouldn't be late. On the other hand, some people don't like that early photography thing and who can blame them (there are cameras now that are noiseless).

Maybe the arbiter should start all the clocks (yes, there will be a slight delay) at the small events. Players can show up when they will. Is a handshake necessary? Why? I do it out of courtesy but I don't need to. Usually the new guys may utter something like "Have a nice game." Me? I just want to win. Cyndi Lauper just wants girls to have fun.

But the most entertaining part of Time's article was a side ad for Mental Floss. I didn't know it was still around.

Chess in the USA needs a real publicist. That's my two cents.

bob@thinkerspressinc.com

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